Round Two?

Today I got an email from eHarmony. I had tried it out around this time last year for about 6 months, but gave up on the whole scene without much luck. I ended up going out on dates with two different guys I met on there – both perfectly nice, but as usual – no chemistry. I swore that I was going to give up on the whole blind dating/online dating scene because I have NEVER pursued anyone I went on a blind date with (and I’ve been on quite a few) and I’ve just never felt or believed that it was the way I’m going to meet someone. I always dreaded the dates, and got really sick of being disappointed. I also decided I was going to start taking the “reactive” dating approach, instead of the “proactive” approach – I started to think that maybe I was just trying and wishing too hard, and that if I just gave up on actively pursuing dates, something would happen the ‘natural’ way.eharmony-logo

But – you know those eHarmony commercials??? MAN! It makes the whole thing look so promising and it’s hard not to be encouraged by those really cute couples! And of course, they haven’t stopped harassing me to renew my membership since I quit, and they have dropped the monthly price so low to get me to sign-up again. I’m considering renewing my membership, but taking a slightly different approach this time. I would love to have my good friends/family write up my profile – after all, they know me better than anyone. THEN – I’d let them review my matches and decide which ones I should pursue. Obviously, I don’t seem to be doing a very good job of picking people out, and I’m the first to admit that I can be picky (although – I still argue that my expectations are NOT unreasonable, and that there is just a shortage of really good, SINGLE men out there.) But, maybe having others choose for me would open my mind a little more….

I’m looking for advice – what do you think loyal readers? Should I give this another go? Or give the ‘natural’ way a little more time?


8 Responses to “Round Two?”

  1. 1 MOM
    January 24, 2009 at 7:11 pm

    GO FOR IT!! I’m happy to help! Go back a read your blog. You may need to view things more positively this time around. Instead of dreading the date, look forward to it. Instead of anticipating disappointment, go with the attitude that this is an adventure (remember the fact finding missions!!). You maybe pleasantly surprised! Love you!!

  2. 2 anona
    January 25, 2009 at 6:34 pm

    I like this quote: “there is just a shortage of really good, SINGLE men out there”.
    Thats why you and all these other women are single. You all think you are the greatest things since sliced cheese. Give it up if you are so great why are you still single, why arent “good” men beating down your door.

  3. 3 Aniketos
    January 25, 2009 at 8:48 pm

    Hey anona, (is that supposed to be Anon? As in ‘Anonymous?’)

    If “you are so great” (and apparently wise) in the ways of dating and why women are single, how come you have nothing better to do then leave snide remarks on blogs written by a single women who is just looking for advice? Or do you know this single girl so well from all her blog posts that you felt justified in criticizing her personality without actually meeting the person? Did you even READ her blog posts? Cause I sure as hell can’t recall any blog post where single girl thought that men should be beating down her door.

    Did you ever stop and think that maybe dating can be as much a matter of luck as personality? When was the last time you tried meeting someone?

    Next time you plan on judging someone, maybe you should actually meet the person before generalizing them and all these other ‘single women’ into one category. Maybe that’s why you’re here posting comments are her blog instead of writing your own with all your worldly advice. At least ‘single girl’ has the guts to share her experiences with all of us.

    Get a life.

  4. January 25, 2009 at 9:19 pm

    Thanks for sharing your comment, anona. However, with respect, I DO find it a bit bold of you to judge and generalize the thoughts of perfect strangers.

    Aniketos – on behalf of me and single women everywhere, THANK YOU ๐Ÿ™‚

  5. January 26, 2009 at 2:47 am

    I just had my friends write up a Match.com profile for me (just as in last Tuesday). It was so nice to get help with it — I agonize over those things and then never end up sounding like myself. I also gave my friends my login info so they could recommend people for me. I always think that sometimes friends see things in us that we don’t see in ourselves, so I’m hoping they’ll see someone who might match up with an aspect of me that I don’t see… The logic in convoluted, but there’s something there. ๐Ÿ™‚

  6. January 26, 2009 at 11:15 am

    I used eHarmony successfully, after I had my friends and family approve my profile, expand it further and pick the photos. I had a basic profile up for a while, but only made the revisions when I decided to join.

    My boyfriend, who I met through eHarmony, mentioned how intriguing my photos and profile were … and how accurately they reflected who I am. I would not necessarily have put myself out as much if I had not asked for advice == and taken it.

    I highly recommend rejoining it and being open to the process. I know that I would have never met my boyfriend in any other way. Now, I cannot imagine finding someone with whom I am better suited.

  7. January 26, 2009 at 6:07 pm

    Mom – your thoughts on this matter are always very clear, but thanks for commenting ๐Ÿ™‚

    Great idea Nicole – I’m hoping my friends will be able to do the same for me! Let me know how it works out for you!

    Planner – thanks!!! It’s so nice to hear positive stories and encouragement from people who have been there. I’m starting to lean towards giving it a go…

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