Posts Tagged ‘christmas

23
Dec
09

the men in my life

Last week, I spent a night out at the mall doing some Christmas shopping with my Dad. We ran around trying to get some gifts taken care of, and enjoyed a nice gourmet dinner in the mall food court. I had such a good time hanging out with him and chatting, just the two of us. When I still lived at home, there was usually about an hour in between the time that my Mom and brother got home that Dad and I would chat, and start getting dinner ready. Having lived on my own for a couple of years now, it’s rare that my Dad and I spend a lot of time together, just him and me.

After I got home that night, it donned on me. I have some pretty amazing men in my life. My Dad is one of them. My brother is another. They’re two of the most sincere, genuine, kind, funny and caring men I have ever known. My Dad would do anything for me – truly. And my brother….he’s wise beyond his years, and someone that I, despite being his older sister, really look up to. You’d be hard pressed to find anyone who would have a bad word to say about either or them. My Dad has no problem starting spontaneous conversations with the most random people – from the sales guy at the GAP, to the vendors at the market he goes to every day for lunch (he’s on a first-name basis with all of them). He has such a genuinely warm personality and this honest sense of humour, that people immediately feel comfortable around him, and it doesn’t take long for him to earn their trust and respect. People really can’t help but love him.

That being said, it makes it easier for me to understand why I’m still single. There’s nothing I hate more than when people accuse ‘singles’ of being picky. Sure, some of them are. But my expectations are reasonable, and I refuse to lower them. I have grown-up with some amazing men who have shown me what it means to be a good man – to be kind and thoughtful, strong but not macho, sensitive but not weak, confident but not cocky, and successful at managing the important relationships in life. AND – good to the women they love and care about. Having grown up with models like that, how could I settle for anything less? John Mayer sums it up better than I ever could here. Enjoy.

“On behalf of every man
Looking out for every girl
You are the god and the weight of her world…

Fathers be good to your daughters.
Daughters will love like you do.
Girls become lovers, who turn into mothers.
So Fathers be good to your daughters too.”

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15
Dec
09

Merry Christmas Charlie Brown

I’m sitting here on the couch watching A Charlie Brown Christmas on TV – an old, childhood favourite. Suddenly, it donned on me. I AM CHARLIE BROWN.

Charlie Brown: I think there must be something wrong with me, Linus. Christmas is coming, but I’m not happy. I don’t feel the way I’m supposed to feel. I just don’t understand Christmas, I guess. I like getting presents and sending Christmas cards and decorating trees and all that, but I’m still not happy. I always end up feeling depressed.

Linus: Charlie Brown, you’re the only person I know who can take a wonderful season like Christmas and turn it into a problem.

AMAZING how a cartoon character can summarize exactly what I’m feeling at this exact point in time. Thank you Charles Schulz.

Christmas is tough when you’re single. There’s just no getting around it, really. I used to really love Christmas. I was one of those ‘annoying’ people who played Christmas carols 24/7, couldn’t wait to decorate, and would start the Christmas countdown in November. As I’ve gotten older, the holiday build-up and excitement has slowly started to wain, and now I just find the whole thing too emotionally draining. I can’t blame it on the singleness alone – I think that as we get older, that whole ‘magic’ of Christmas tends to fade a bit, but being lonely certainly doesn’t help. And I am lonely.

Here’s a question. Why are the most emotionally difficult holidays all grouped together? Christmas, New Year’s, Valentine’s Day, and for me, my birthday. BRUTAL. When you’re single, you can’t not feel alone when everyone around you is happily in love and enjoying the holidays with significant others. I even find it difficult to enjoy time with family over the holidays because I am now the only grandchild on both sides of my family who is STILL single (with lots of cousins). I HATE that this is what I inevitably end up focusing on this time of year, but it’s like everything I do and everywhere I go, I’m reminded of the fact that I’m alone. I’m lucky to have friends and family, and I know many people don’t. But at the same time, I find it so easy to feel lonely in a crowded room these days…

Do any of you single folks out there agree with me that the regularity of the holidays is part of what makes it so hard year, after year? Each of these holi-days is an anniversary of the ones before. So inevitably, I find myself thinking about where I’m going to be at this time next year, and where I was at this time last year – and year, after year I find myself hoping that 365 days from now, I will have someone special in my life to share the holidays with. Six years running, I have been disappointed. I find it hard to stay positive…

Keeping me going are my plans for New Year’s. Although my European trip fell through (VERY long story that ended in a canceled flight with a $450 cancellation fee), my friend JD and I decided to stay a little closer to home and booked a 3-day trip to Quebec City; the “Europe” of Canada 🙂 I am torn about missing the annual party at B&C’s as I missed it last year as well. But, I’m not emotionally strong enough to handle it at this point in time and as much as I will miss the party and all my friends there, I’m looking forward to celebrating New Year’s with a great friend.

Despite this ‘pity party’ post (and I realize it IS just that, but that’s why I created this blog for ME), I am going to do my very best to work on keeping myself happy this holiday season, as was reminded by my fellow blogger Mel. In the mean time, I’ll leave you with this little thought from my Charlie Brown friend, Linus:

“I never thought it was such a bad little tree. It’s not bad at all, really. Maybe it just needs a little love.”

21
Nov
09

Merry Christmas (to me)

I’ve said before that one of the advantages of being single is that you save money having to buy gifts for a significant other (and his family) on special occasions. So the way I see it, I might as well spend the money I would spend on a boyfriend – on myself!

That’s why this week, C. and I booked ourselves Christmas facials at one of the swankiest spas in town. For one hour, it’s going set me back WAY too much but I don’t care. C. and I agreed this would be our Christmas present to each other and I’m justifying spending the other half (we’d never usually spend this much on each other!) as a Christmas present to myself…

Single? Merry Christmas to you! Go out and treat yourself to something special 🙂 I HIGHLY recommend a spa facial…




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